THE ONES THAT GOT AWAY, 2010-2014

Some actors can name every show they’ve ever done and some can’t. But can you think of all the shows you didn’t get to do?

Though my time in theatre began in 2009, I had a fairly slow start since I did not venture out into community theatre until 2011. Any show I tried to do after the first one was met with disappointment and the time between my first two shows stretched to a year and a half. Since I was a guy who could sing, I was cast in the musicals at Sonoma State, but other shows did not come to me until I ventured into community theatre.

As is the case with most actors, there have been several shows I’ve auditioned for, only to be rejected and there have also been shows that I’ve turned down for one reason or another. I have lost out on more shows than I have done, but as with anyone rejected from a show, I have tried to determine why I did not get the part and improve on the next one. I've also had to drop out for whatever reason, whether to do a different show, or personal problems that arose.

Whether I am rejected or I leave on my own, I usually, though not always, refrain from seeing those shows because I feel it would be too painful to watch someone else play the role I wanted or I would regret my decision to leave. The biggest exception to that rule is I will see the show if I can see it for free. After all, really, who turns down a free ticket?

In the blog posts with the title "The Ones that Got Away," I will reminisce about shows I lost out on. For memory reasons, I will only elaborate on individual show auditions or offers because I cannot for the life of me remember all the general auditions I have done. For this post, I’ll begin with my early years through my first successful year in community theatre, 2010-2013. The shows are listed in the order in which they were staged in the linear year, rather than in the order in which I auditioned.

Looking back, I amazed at how many shows I remember not doing. While racking my brains, after thinking I got them all, I would suddenly remember one that I hadn’t thought about in years. Even after I first posted this there were times when a show that I'd forgotten about suddenly came to me out of the blue.

2009

COMPANY, Sonoma State University

This was the first time I ever auditioned for a show. Period. It was a general audition, but having been bitten by the theatre bug when watching a musical, I wanted to do a musical. I had only just started learning to sing the previous semester and I did not have that much experience. The musical that year at Sonoma State was Stephen Sondheim's Company. I went in, sang a song did a monologue and sang a song, basically, everything required of me.

In the end I wasn't called back or cast in that show, but I was cast in Growing Up in Neverland. A couple friends of mine were cast in Company, so I saw it a few times (for free since I was a student) and, after viewing it, I could see why I wasn't cast. The people who made the cut were actors who had much singing and acting experience and since there were only six men in the cast, they would only take the best and that was not me. Not by a long stretch. So, I continued learning to sing for the rest of my time in college and waited for the next musical opportunity.

2010

DOG SEES GOD: CONFESSIONS OF A TEENAGE BLOCKHEAD, Sonoma State University 

I had always found Sonoma State to be rather stifling with their theatre. They picked shows that were not popular taste, and they were not the best directors, I felt, for shows. In the musicals they were not as good as they could have been mainly because movement and dancing were not done often (or very well) in their productions. Even so, I had several friends by the time I was a senior and the remainder of that time there was very happy and idyllic for me. Still, as a student I could always get into the performances for free, sometimes seeing the same show repeatedly.

This show, a teenage Charlie Brown play, took place the semester after my first show. It was not a show for the college main season, but rather one that was produced by the Stage One Theatre Club. The main role I remember reading for was Matt (Pigpen); I did read for others, but this one is the clearest to me. What I remember most clearly was that I had a hard time reading it because his first line in the show requires the n-word and I could not bring myself to say it. If that was what cost me the role, I have no regrets because I refuse to compromise my beliefs for a show. In the end, the director cast people she was rather chummy with and even had to play a role herself when the original actress injured her leg.

ROCK AND ROLL, Sonoma State University

The next Sonoma State main stage show that was available after my first show was Rock and Roll by Tom Stoppard. The director of the play was the head of the acting department at Sonoma State, a man I later regretted taking a class with. He was unhelpful and would let you drown before throwing you a lifeline. But before I knew this I went in, hoping to do a serious acting role, only to not be cast in favor of the students of the acting block, a two year conservatory style acting course for acting majors. I sometimes regret not being at least an acting minor and taking that course because for all I know it might have improved my skills with Shakespeare and Commedia dell’Arte. I do not regret not being in this show because after I saw it I hadn’t a clue as to what happened at all. It was a complex and confusing play. When the school year ended, I had to leave for my hometown for three months and wait until the next season at SSU.

2011

MR. MARMELADE, Narrow Way Stage Company

My love of Narrow Way Stage Company productions goes back to 2009. While in rehearsals for Growing Up in Neverland, we had a night off and some of the older members of the cast took some of us to see their current show, Riff Raff. I believe that they selected that performance because their friend was performing that night. The show had three characters, but two actors for each role and they would have multiple combinations during the run. I loved the performance, but did not make my back to one of their shows until the end of the following summer when I attended both Richard III and Cyrano de Bergerac, their two summer shows, which were being performed in Rep. After that, with the exception of one show, Private Wars, I never missed a Narrow Way show. In late 2010, I auditioned for one of their shows which went up in January 2011.

At the time I was cast in the musical at Sonoma State, which was to go up in February 2011 with rehearsals to resume once winter break was over. However, most of the run for Mr. Marmelade would’ve been over winter break and I wouldn’t have missed that many rehearsals for the musical. I knew of this audition and show because someone I had met during the 24-hour new play weekend that Sonoma State did, became friendly with me afterward. He was on the Narrow Way board at the time and sometimes directed shows for the company. I went in and read for half the characters, whether one of the imaginary friends or the little boy, but not the adult characters. I thought I did a good job, but in the end, Narrow Way regulars and actors far better and more seasoned than I, received the roles, but I still went to see it. Glad I did because it was hysterical, and it was the first time that I laughed so hard I cried.

BRINGING IT ALL BACK HOME, Sonoma State University

While in rehearsals for Die Fledermaus in the fall semester, I saw a notice on one of the billboards in the theatre arts building at Sonoma State for this show. It was a senior project for a friend of mine. The show was only four performances, about two weeks before Die Fledermaus was due to begin, so I thought this might be fun. I read for two roles- the father and the younger son who was still alive. I thought I made some really good choices while reading for the father and I thought I was going to get it.

In the end I didn’t receive any role; the role of the father went to another person who, like me, was a history major doing theatre shows on campus. And he did some of the things in the show that I did during my audition. I saw the show and I lamented I wasn't cast. It couldn’t have been because of the other show because someone in that show with me was cast in this one. Oh well.

 

MY FAIR LADY, Santa Rosa Junior College

My Fair Lady is one of my favorite musicals and Henry Higgins is the role I dream to play. When I heard about this show I knew I had to audition, but it was expected, by others, that I would do Oklahoma at Sonoma State. I decided that the dream role was what I wanted most of all. Knowing nothing about SRJC shows, I was amazed at the number of people auditioning. I auditioned with song and did the dance routine, which was tough since I had not brought looser clothes for dancing, having no idea what was in store.

Before this, I was used to going in with a song for the initial audition, while the dances would be taught during callbacks. This was the first time when the two were held on the same night. Not only that, but we had a brief group session with the vocal director where we'd sing our songs with the accompanist in front of all the other people auditioning.

 During callbacks, when speaking with the director I was adamant that I would accept Henry Higgins and no other role. She felt I was too stiff for the part, but she gave me a chance to read the role and also asked me to sing and read for Freddie. She did like some of the choices I made as Freddie, but in the end, I didn’t make it, but a friend of mine was cast as Higgins. I was devastated and for six months afterward I had a falling out with that guy after he felt and said in a condescending way, that some of the things I said about the director were inappropriate. With that gone, I was cast in Oklahoma, though not in the role I desired in that either.

Being picky on roles can be costly, but for this one, I knew I could not accept watching another person play the role I desired more than anything. I have never regretted not doing this show after losing that role.

 

2012

SWEENEY TODD, Santa Rosa Junior College

This was a show that I was both rejected from and decided not to do after all.

The production of Sweeney Todd that I did at the Raven Players in Healdsburg (see "Sweeney Todd" post) was not the first time I had tried to do that show. After My Fair Lady, the spring musical that season at SRJC was that and I worked really hard on my audition song, “Sorry, Grateful,” from Company. The show had two separate auditions, the first in the fall semester for the main characters so that the actors could begin learning their parts, and then chorus roles would audition at the beginning of the following semester. I went to the first audition, but I was not called back to read anything. At first, I wanted to go back, but then I decided on something else. As that was my final year at Sonoma State, I decided that that semester I would do the Music Theatre Scenes Workshop class one final time, and performances for that conflicted with Sweeney performances.

After I saw the show, I did have a twinge of regret at not doing the show because I felt it was one of the best I had seen in years. I even ended up paying to see it twice. Every now and then though, I sometimes wonder if I will wake up and say “I really wish I had gone again for that.” It was that good!

THE LION IN WINTER, Curtain Call Theatre

I first heard about this show on Facebook. I don’t know why, but the company was short an actor for this show. I contacted the director saying I was interested, and he invited me to come audition by reading the play with the rest of the cast. It was a bit of a drive, but the role was something I felt I could play. It was for the role of John, the youngest son in the show. The director described him as someone who was spoiled and whinny and tried to act like a big tough man. In other words, it was a perfect role. After that I was contacted by the director and told they went with someone else. I didn’t feel too bad because the show was in Rio Nido, and I don’t think I would’ve liked the commute. But something good came of it. One actor in the show contacted me about playing a role in a show he was directing there next. I can’t remember the title, but it mattered little because during the run I had a trip to Alaska planned.

In my opinion, I lost the role because I was still too green at the time. That’s all to that story.

LEGALLY BLONDE, Spreckels Theatre Company

This was the first time I tried to do a show at the Spreckels Theatre Company. I had worked in the building before when I did Reefer Madness with Narrow Way Stage. I had recently finished Oklahoma at Sonoma State, lost out on the role in Lion in Winter and had nothing else immediately planned and it would be staged before I left town for my vacation. Unfortunately, I had either missed auditions, or I could not make it, I do not remember which. I contacted the director saying I was interested, and he said he’d arrange a separate time for me to come and audition. And that was the last I heard of it. Shortly after, I lost interest and didn’t revisit it. But I can live with it because I saw the show and, in my opinion, the show was not all that good.

PICASSO AT THE LAPIN AGILE and HARVEY, Three Rabbit Productions

These two were shows I had not thought about in years, buried deep in repressed memory. Then suddenly, when I thought I had listed all the shows I’ve lost out on, it came to me. I found out about these through a friend of mine because his girlfriend was one of the directors. The company itself, from what I can tell on its Facebook page, has not staged a show since then, though it did try to the following year. At the time I still had no project for the summer, and I thought these would be a good option. The two shows were performed in Repertory at the Phoenix Theater in Petaluma. I went in and did my audition, though what it involved doing, I haven’t the faintest idea. However, at the end of the auditions, they told the actors who they wanted to see again, but I was not called back. I’m inclined to think they went with people who are their friends, since the two directors were students at the Santa Rosa Junior College and the actors were also mainly students from there.

TWO GENTLEMEN OF SONOMA (VERONA), CAPS Productions

I do not get to audition for Shakespeare shows often, but I can't resist doing it if one comes around. I don't remember exactly when I auditioned for this or if I had auditioned for other shows. If I had gotten into this one, it would've been right after The Threepenny Opera closed.

The day of my audition it was just me and one other guy, who was a friend of mine. I thought I did very well, mainly because the dialogue was fairly comprehensible for Shakespeare. In the end though I was not cast, though the other guy was. I decided to go ahead and see it. I could've played any of the roles I read for, I thought.

LEGALLY BLONDE, Marin Summer Theater

This musical escaped me not once, but twice in 2012. I read about this show and also Spring Awakening for Marin Summer Theater because a flyer about auditions was posted on one of the bulletin boards in the theatre building at Sonoma State. At the time I still did not have a summer project, so I decided to go for it. I did some checking on this and apparently, the company was only for students up to the age of twenty-one. I was just twenty-one and so just barely fit the requirement. I couldn't do Spring Awakening because I had a vacation planned for most of when it would go up. However, I did go for Legally Blonde, doing the dancing and reading for Professor Callahan. I didn't get cast at all, but a friend of mine, also aged twenty-one, did get the part.

I decided not to go see it because I had already seen it a few months earlier at Spreckels Theater in Rohnert Park, and I was in no desire to see it again so soon.
 

BEAUTY AND THE BEAST, Santa Rosa Junior College

At times I feel I’m a masochist. This show was directed by the same person who did My Fair Lady and I auditioned anyway. A lot of my friends from Sonoma State went to audition and for weeks prior to that, two of my friends and I talked about the roles we wanted. I wanted to play Cogsworth, feeling I could play a stuffy tightly wound clock. Unlike My Fair Lady, this time I was more than prepared for everything, remembering back on my experiences with My Fair Lady, like bring clothing for dancing, and I felt I did reasonably well.

But I was already in another show, The Elephant Man, and that sealed my fate. While the show ended up being cast with a few SSU students or former students from this school, I was not among them. I never even received a callback. It was after this show that I learned that the Junior College, unlike other theatre companies, is very unforgiving to conflicts. Supposedly, they expect you to be present for each and every rehearsal.

Shame. Sometimes I wish it hadn't been so. It was a pretty good production.

 

FUNNY GIRL, Lucky Penny Productions

I’m going to be honest; I am not 100% entirely sure I did audition for this, but I must have because I have a memory of reading for roles in that musical and Lucky Penny is the only company in either Sonoma or Napa County that has done that one by this posting. I was looking for a new project after A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum and I thought this might be fun. I went in, sang my song, read the roles, but I wasn’t cast. Probably best, I couldn’t have afforded the commute at the time. I don’t know what I was thinking.

I decided not to see this, because I didn't feel like driving all the way out to Napa. Not back then anyway. Since that time, I'm more financially stable and can afford to see a show out there sometimes. 

SINGIN’ IN THE RAIN, 6^th Street Playhouse

This was not the first time I auditioned for a show at 6^th Street Playhouse, having done general auditions before, but this was the first time I auditioned for a show on its own there. I was in search of a summer project, and I wanted to work here very much because I rather like the size of the main theater space. Not too big, not too small.

This was one of my more grueling dance auditions, mainly because I had never tap danced nor had I attempted to tap dance before in my life. In the beginning I was hesitant to audition for this show at all for that reason because while I can learn dance moves fairly well, tap dancing is another matter entirely. It was one of the most difficult things I’ve ever had to do, and I sucked big time. I read for some roles the same day, including Cosmo Brown, but I knew while reading it that there was no way I could ever do a back flip off a wall. I just didn’t have the dancing skills necessary to make the cut.

 

BRIGADOON, Spreckels Theatre Company

I did not handle this one very well. Looking back, I should have done things differently. This was in the fall of 2013 and at the time I had this and three other shows in mind for a project. The other two were Les Miserables at SRJC and One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest at 6^th Street Playhouse. From the start, Cuckoo’s Nest was at the top of the list of shows I wanted to do, and I did have a callback from the 6^th Street general auditions. But there was nothing assured about getting into that show.

I have no memory of auditioning for this one and I’m not sure I did, but I was contacted by the director about being in it. I said I would but looking back now I realize I shouldn’t have done that. I meant for this one to be a backup in case I did not get into Cuckoo’s Nest. When I did get cast in Cuckoo’s Nest, I dropped out of this, much to the disappointment of the director. Even so, I have no regrets about it.

2014

 2014 was, quite possibly, the busiest year in theatre I’ve ever had. I like to think on this period as the peak of my younger years of theatrical life. It was the time when I feel I was at the top of my game, doing at least four shows a year, getting paid to do shows, and getting good roles or at least roles that were more than ensemble.

After the death of my father the previous year, I found solace in doing shows and threw myself into them completely. I auditioned for twelve shows that year and was offered a role in a show out of the blue at the end of the year, when I thought I’d finished. But for all my success, I lost out on eight shows that year. And yet, of those eight, I dropped out more than I was rejected.

DIRTY ROTTEN SCOUNDRELS, 6^th Street Playhouse

This show was not exactly one that got away from me. Rather, I pushed it away in the end. I went in and auditioned and went to callbacks. But soon, I took a good look at the roles I was reading and singing for, and I thought “What the hell am I doing? There’s no way he’s ever going to cast me in one of the character roles." Basically, I was auditioning to be ensemble. I did not want to audition for a show where I had absolutely no chance for a character role, so I decided to opt out instead.

I was too busy with Little Shop of Horrors to go see this show. The experience of this audition taught me to really think about whether I wanted to do a show or not. If it had a role I wanted to play, then yes. If it was a show I really liked or meant something to me, then yes. Otherwise, what was the point?

 

NOISES OFF, The Raven Players

I’ve always liked this play, ever since I saw it in high school. How could anyone not like it? This was the first time since Evita when I audition for a show at The Raven in Healdsburg. I read for a few roles but doing it in a British accent was tough. I’m inclined to believe that I was outacted by the men who did make the cut, but I wasn’t too worried over it because this play is produced quite often, so I figured there would be plenty of other times when it would come along, and I could just go for it again.

Shortly before this show premiered, I quit my job, and therefore, I was unable to see the show, since I tried to save money. Though, I probably wouldn’t have anyway because I don’t recall knowing anyone in the cast.

SPAMALOT, Santa Rosa Junior College

Though the show was not staged until May, this was the first audition I had in 2014 and it did not go smoothly. In fact, this audition was one of the more frustrating ones I did at SRJC or anywhere for that matter. I went for it because I love Spamalot; it’s such a fun looking show, hysterically funny, and very active. I went through the song and dance part of the audition and then I had to rush off to do a performance of Victor/Victoria. I also had one the next day when the callbacks were to take place. I was told it would be okay to come after the performance. I came and waited for four hours, ended up cancelling a date, waiting for them to call me in. Finally, after nine, I was told I could leave. But then, someone, maybe the stage manager, realized I had done absolutely nothing. She ran inside to inform the director and I only got to do one song. A huge waste of my time by all accounts, but I’ll never know how it would’ve gone had I been available for the whole day.

CATCH ME IF YOU CAN, Spreckels Theatre Company

This one was purely my fault, there’s no question about it. I did the same thing I did for Brigadoon, obviously not having learned my lesson. I don’t remember actually auditioning for this one, but I was offered a place in it. But then, shortly after that, I was offered a place in Little Shop of Horrors, which I had auditioned for earlier. I decided that Little Shop was closer to my heart that Catch Me if You Can, so I chose that. After I informed the director of Catch Me If You Can, he was not happy about it. He said he would be reluctant to work with me again. And I never did.

I’m glad I turned this show down, because when I saw it, I felt it wasn’t anything special. Just not a particularly memorable show.

 

THE FULL MONTY and THE MANY FACES OF LOVE, Sonoma Theatre Alliance (now Sonoma Arts Live)

I mention these two shows together because I had to turn them down for the same reason and they were back-to-back in order. The Full Monty was in the spring and The Many Faces of Love was around the same time as Romeo and Juliet (more below).

The first time I saw the musical, The Full Monty was at 6^th Street Playhouse, and I liked the score so much I bought the soundtrack. I had never auditioned for a fully staged show in Sonoma before, but the first time was at the general auditions this year and it was one of the most successful auditions I had because I was called back for five of the shows that season and eventually cast in three. I did the callbacks for The Full Monty and was invited to read for The Many Faces of Love. While I cast in a small part in The Full Monty, I had to drop out because I had to quit my job and with no source of income, I dedicated all my energies to finding a new one. For that reason, I declined the offer to read for the other play and I did not attend either show. I had to be very frugal until a new job came my way.

 

ROMEO AND JULIET, Shakespeare in the Cannery

This was the first and only time I ever cried over losing a role. This was the debut show of Shakespeare in the Cannery in Santa Rosa. By the time auditions came around, I had a new job which, as luck would have it, made it possible for me to do theatre again. I was dead set on auditioning for this one, partially because I still had not done a Shakespeare show since Merry Wives of Windsor, but more importantly, because the role of Mercutio is one of my dream roles and I wouldn’t be young enough to play the role forever. I went in and did my two Shakespeare monologues, but I don’t think the director even considered me for that role.

 I don’t remember if we finished everything that day or if the callbacks were on a separate day, but the director asked me if I’d read for Tybalt. I thought he was crazy; I emphatically told him I would read if he wanted me to, but even I knew I was wrong for that role. Probably not the best option for an actor, but I had no intention of reading a role I knew where I wouldn’t be convincing. In the end, I did not read for that part. I think I did read for Mercutio and Romeo. I don’t remember much else of what I did, but when the casting was announced, I wasn’t cast as anything. And then to see another actor, who by all accounts is much better than I am, cast in the role I wanted, it devastated me.

In the end I did attend because a friend of mine was cast as Lady Capulet which, even on the day of auditions, I told her she’d get. I mainly went to see her. It was tough for me to watch the show, but some comfort was that Romeo and Juliet is an oft-produced play and I had a feeling it would come around again.

What I learned from this show is never, ever, ever say no if the director asks you to read for a role, even if it isn't one you want or one you know you won't get. It makes you come off as being difficult and it would be best to just let them see that you are not right for the role.

 

THE BOYS IN THE BAND, Pegasus Theatre Company

This one was touched upon briefly in the Post “Alice: The Rebellion of Wonderland.” It simply ended up not being staged because not enough men auditioned for it to happen.

 

THE ADDAMS FAMILY, 6^th Street Playhouse

I was offered the chance to come and read for this one but, unfortunately, I had to work that day at the time they wanted me to come in. I don't remember if they couldn’t reschedule, or if I had accepted a role in a different show. What I do remember is that I was invited to come and read for the role of Lurch. The callback would simply involve singing his song and playing with movement. I laughed out loud when I read the email, because I felt I was wrong for the role. Others I spoke to later felt I would’ve been wonderful (in other words, they were out of their minds). I might’ve been able to act it, but I felt I was wrong for two small, but crucial reasons: I was too thin and I was too short, even with platform shoes. The person they did cast was about 6’4’’ and bulky. But it didn’t matter because I was cast in Dracula. That prevented me from seeing the show, but I wouldn’t have gone anyway because it was of no interest to me.